Somatic Sex
&
intimacy coach

Offering sessions in Dutch and English, in person in Amsterdam as well as online.

We can explore

  • Consent and boundary skills
  • Experiencing new types of pleasure with yourself and your partner(s)
  • Anatomy that is useful for your sex life
  • More control over when, if, and how you orgasm
  • Premature ejaculation and erectile difficulties
  • Self-pleasure
  • Experiences of pain during sex or in your genitals
  • How to give and receive pleasure and erotic touch
  • Developing a more loving relationship with your body
  • Your relationship with porn
  • Scar-tissue remediation
  • Being more present during sex
  • Anal pleasure
  • Relaxed states of arousal
  • Your (sexual) confidence
  • Learning to notice, value, and communicate your desires
  • Befriending shame and anxiety
  • Unlearning sexual conditioning and rewriting your erotic script
Portrait of Kinsey Pagden

About me

I am a Certified Sexological Bodyworker, Somatic Sex Educator and workshop facilitator.

My training with different schools of Somatic Sexology and soft touch de-armouring, and an ongoing practice of Taoist sexuality and meditation form the basis of my professional offerings, utilizing a variety of approaches and perspectives.

I identify as queer, and I welcome people from all gender identities, sexual orientations, and relationship styles.

I truly believe that a healthy relationship with our own sexuality is the key to a balanced and happy life, with ourselves, the people we love and the world at large.

I am a member of the Association of Certified Sexological Bodyworkers, the ACSB. I abide by their code of professional conduct and ethics, honoring the safety of both client and facilitator. I receive regular peer-supervision and supervision from experienced supervisors.

Learn what you can do

What is somatic sex coaching & sexological bodywork?

With somatic sex and intimacy coaching, we explore and support sexual health. We combine sex education (the one you never had at school), guided explorations, embodiment practices, and mindfulness. In somatic sex and intimacy coaching, we learn to develop greater body awareness. By having new experiences on a physical level, formative imprints can be released, allowing us to learn new and more desired behaviors.

Sexological bodywork

Somatic sex and intimacy coaching combines the inner, felt awareness of the body with the scientific study of human sexuality. It is grounded in counter-normative understandings of gender, sex, sexuality, and relationships. I am a certified sexological bodyworker. This means that besides somatic sex- and intimacy coaching our work together may include (erotic) touch. Sexological bodywork is a gentle, body-centered approach to explore your desires, resolve concerns, and learn new skills. It allows you to learn experimentally, through the body, where (self)touch is an option, never a requirement. Erotic touch is always directed one way: the practitioner touching the client, and only at the client’s request.

Benefits of touch

Extensive research on the science of touch has documented incredible emotional, mental, and physical benefits from touch, suggesting it is truly fundamental to human communication, bonding, and health. Touch can create an instant change in our physiological state, including our nervous system, which directly influences the way we feel about ourselves and the world around us. Touch is our primary language and our first way of communicating with our caregivers and the outside world. It directly relates to our sense of self. Through present, conscious touch, we can connect to our wordless places, making it a potentially powerful tool for healing. Having the experience of receiving only the touch you wanted and asked for, nothing more and nothing less, can be very profound.

Pleasure and arousal are welcome in sexological bodywork. We make space for them in a shame-free environment. You practice listening to your body’s sensations and identifying, voicing, asking for, and receiving the kind of touch you truly desire.

Practices

Practices may include body scans, breathing exercises, nervous system regulation, working with boundaries and embodied consent, pleasure or anatomical mapping, erotic massage and scar-tissue remediation.

Training and education

  • Leffelaar College- Holistische Massage 2008-2009

  • The Gaia Method, Suzanne Roursgaard- Female Sexuality and de-armouring 2020 and 2021
  • Self Cervix – Release and Rapture 2020-2021
  • The Gala Method. Suzanne Rougard-Send Healin act de armouring 22021 and
  • Institute for the Study of Somatic Sex Education, Canada- foundations
  • Bodymind Upleidingen -Integrated Psychotherapy, Netherlands- basic year 2022-2023
  • Upledger Institute – Cranio Sacraal Level 1 2022*
  • The Embodylab – Somatic Attachment Therapy – certificate program 2022
  • The Embodylab- Integrative Somatic Trauma Therapy – certificate program 2023
  • Institute of Somatic Sexology, England- Certified Sexological Bodywork 2021

Ongoing trainings

  • Taotraining nI, Reinout Eleveld, from 2020 and ongoing

What happens in a session

Each session starts with a conversation about your intentions. Based on your intentions, I will offer different somatic exercises or practices. You choose what resonates with you, and together we agree on the work we aim to accomplish. We co-create the session together.

At any time during the session, you can change your mind, and we will re-evaluate what’s next. We may do all the practices we intended on doing. We will never do anything we did not agree to at the start of the session.

After the active part of the session, there is time for integration. Integrating to a new point of reference in pleasure and embodiment is as important as the active part of the session. Integration starts in the session and continues in the days after. A follow-up email within a few days after the session can support you in your process.

I will prepare exercises tailored to your aims and intentions, allowing you to continue your practice in the comfort of your home.

After our first session, we will discuss the option of a series of sessions tailored to your unique situation and intentions.

Get in touch

Schedule a free 20 minute discovery call to see if it is a mutual fit.

Practicalities

I offer sessions in Dutch and in English. I can help you online as well as welcome you in person in my studio in Amsterdam. Depending on your preferences and needs I offer sessions from 1 to 2.5 hours in person. (1 hour sessions online are possible).

Investment:

1/hr 120, 1.5/hr 170, 2/hr 210, 2.5/hr 250

Online: 100/hr

(packages and low income options available on request)

Kind words

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Richard Jeremy

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Richard Jeremy

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Richard Jeremy

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Richard Jeremy